Some Kind of Woman

I am focused 
yet aimless
eye on the lies
Truth
(like the fullness of God)
seems unknowable
How do we step forward
in such desperate uncertainty 

I am hopeless
yet abundant 
a heart so broken
so full of light 
some dreams flutter away into nothing
some grow fingers and toes
I steel myself
to roll with whatever
to raise my praise
at the end of
every day

prose can’t grasp it
can’t carry it
He is
exceedingly
abundantly
beyond
there are layers upon layers
nuance within nuance
gold bars inside the
difficultest
of places
(of people)
of images
of God

always felt I had a gift
of poetry
and observation
of language
and silence
it’s only ‘mine’
insofar as I tend to it 
a garden 
isn’t matured 
by a man

so even though 
it’s taken me
a score
I am positively blooming
into the woman
God intended

I consider a field
and then I buy it